while my chest tremendously aches

such a dramatic title for such a wee little pup.

let's chat for a moment about the small ache that i carry around in my chest each day.  that little part of me where i actually lose my oxygen, where the sadness presses against my lungs and hearts and shoots a resounding gong of lament when i see a certain four legged furry thing in a picture, on skype, or even another furry thing on the streets of cambodia.

the CERTAIN little furry thing is named boomer.

she is deeply loved not only be me but by countless others.

her wacky little ear, her fuzzy little belly, her relentless little growl at the doorbell.

each piece is a heavy and sharp pang.

and every time i ride my bike, i see countless furry reminders of my boomer.  furry little animals, covered in invisible fleas, missing spots of fur, often with rib cages protruding through it all, noses scouring plastic bags and rubbish piles for remnants of rice.

endless pangs for man's best friend that are anything but in my new country.  friends that are in fact rather guard dogs, things to be tolerated, but more often a nuisance, something that gets in the way of all moving vehicles on the roads, loud thumps when they aren't seen after the sun has set.

it's not that cambodians hate dogs- i haven't seen anyone maliciously attempt to seriously harm a dog.  and it's not that it's a bad place with bad dog-hating people. it's just the pup reality here.

and the reality just is.

and to end on a happy note, a video of the boomster playing a favorite game called "slide on the floor" at my parent's house.

how deeply would you miss your furster if you moved to another country?