expletive deleted

a very old picture, circa college years.

i am making myself brownies for dinner, which in itself is probably enough of an explanation about the kind of afternoon i had.

it started as a wonderful morning, full of jaunty walks to buy chris some peach-ring-delicious-imitators and flouncy bicycle rides amongst cambodian drivers that have no real understanding of a traffic circle, and the best beefy macaroni and cheese with two fantastic gals.

which led to the following text conversation with husband:

"you make it on the bus honey? miss you"

"on. it's the broken hot bus. and the woman sitting next to me just called me french."

("barang" is the word all unknowing cambodians call all foreigners. it actually means french. i corrected her, telling her i was, in fact, not french, but american.)

"expletive deleted. sounds like a nice day. sorry honey. trying to figure the logistics of bring you home some barbecue or brownie."

"ha, don't worry about it!"

two hours later

"hows it going, frenchy?"

"well halfway through she began asking me questions in incomplete khmer despite me asking her to please speak more clearly and then another woman asked me the same questions and then original lady told me i would not be so hot if i wasn't fat so i told her i wasn't fat, thank, and skinny is ugly. also it's as hot as van we took last week and the bus driver is going so fast i am terrified we are going to crash and i may die. i am in an incredibly terrible mood and i feel like punching the next person who talks to me and i still have to bargain with the expletive deleted tuk tuk drivers to get home. how are you?"




and that, dear friends, is how the small things that normally are tiny, laughable annoyances- the heat, being called french, the assumption i do not understand khmer, the marvel that i do, the bargaining for everything, lack of safety while traveling, and the lack of any modern conveniences that we take for granted in america- can become an onslaught creating a near breakdown when one does not have the presence of mind or presence of a level-headed husband to serve as a buffer.


but now, there are brownies, and partially reformed-from-melting cookies 'n' creme chocolate bars, and back to the future on asian hbo*!


so, really, we have a good day here people. if you leave out that middle part.  expletive deleted style.


*edited to add: turns out we're talking a back to the future MARATHON people.  my frown is officially upside down!