On our trip, Topher was constantly joking around about he's the domestic one- he cooks, he cleans, he walks the dog. I work. It was funny, but only because it's true. Then, it wasn't so funny- again, because it's true.
He walks the dog at night, mainly because it's dark and I'm afraid of the dark. It's supposed to be my job to do it in the morning. Often, though I'm running late and I tell him "I'll pay him a million bucks" or "a million kisses" or a million other things that are slightly more risque if he'll walk Boomer for me. So he does.
When we go to bed at night, often I'll leave my water glass or my ice cream bowl by the TV downstairs. It's not that I want to leave it there- I honestly just don't see it. It's like I look past it. Or, I tell myself I'll get it in the morning. Problem is, by the time I get home at 7...or 8...or 9, he's already picked it up and loaded the dishwasher.
Now, the feminist side of me says ROCK ON! He and I both joke that he's simply making up for hundreds of years of inequity.
Then there's the other side me that screams "YOU'RE A SUCKY WIFE!" Usually I tell it to shut up, I'm tired, I just worked 80 hours.
Other times, I tell myself to get home earlier to make dinner. Then I usually get up a bake a batch of cookies. Because what I do have time for is baking. Of course.
Anyone else feel like a sucky partner in some way?
you're not a sucky wife, don't say that! i'm going to assume that this post is obviously very one-sided and that, if given the chance, topher could list 1 MILLION things that you do that make your lives better. so housework isn't one of your big strengths, big deal.
ReplyDeleteI do sometimes. Im not a wife yet...but i have been living with my man since October...i think i have made him dinner 5 times...it makes me sad..i know im not being sucky...im just not being the "wife" i thought i would always be..or maybe "should" be. Either way I know where you are coming from.
ReplyDeleteI honestly don't think that Topher would agree with the sentiment that you are a sucky wife. After all, I'll bet he loves the fact that you bake yummy cookies for him just because. You don't have to be a domestic diva to be a good wife, it's all about give and take. He does these things because he cares about you, and I'm sure there are lots of things that you do for him that you just don't even think about, because you do it automatically!
ReplyDeleteOh ktisthatbees, you are so right :) He read this same post and said the exact same thing to me :) Thank you!
ReplyDeleteOh girl, I know how that feels! When I was in VA, Justin was doing literally everything for me, and I felt like the biggest jerk ever. I'd be in the office with my nose stuck in research, and he'd peek his head in the door and say "are you going to eat dinner?" or "do you think you'll have time to watch some TV with me tonight?" Guilt...guilt guilt guilt. But, like everyone else said, Topher's doing it because he loves you, and you do special things for him too, so it all works out ;)
ReplyDeleteI'm not even kidding this is so me. I can't cook and frankly don't know how. My hubby is a carnivore, I'm a vegetarian. I HATE cleaning, he loves it. I've become accustomed to him doing all of it. I feel like a failure at times. Thank you for this post! I know that I need to do little things for him and I know that he is doing all of this because he loves me!
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